This article examines family finances. We often see couples wearing the same attire and riding in the same car. It is, however, unfortunate to discover that while some of these couples appear to be intimate outwardly, they are disunited in their relationship. This suggests that they lack a biblical understanding of oneness in marriage.
Oneness in a marriage relationship has its foundation in the Garden of Eden, where God created Eve from Adam and made a pronouncement that they are no longer two but one. Interestingly, Adam recognised that Eve was part of him and that they were “One flesh”.
Therefore, oneness in marriage has to do with complete unity or commitment to each other in every aspect of life, as a couple. When a Christian couple miss the principle of “Oneness”, their relationship to live and relate together will be negatively affected.
Therefore, this study would address the Biblical foundation of oneness in marriage, some misconceptions about it and hindrances to true oneness in marriage. This article examines family finance: different views on operating joint accounts and how to overcome a financial crisis.
Family Finance
It has been observed that one major area where married couples have failed to demonstrate Christian understanding and maturity is in the management of finances. It is a well-known fact that money occupies a decisive position in the family. It is one of the strongest factors of a radiant home if only the principle of becoming “One Flesh” is well understood and applied.
The standard of family financing we are presenting in this article is the biblical standard; it is not based on tradition, practice or culture. Therefore, this article will not consider any human philosophy as a basis or standard. That any family cannot or does not do or practice the lessons does not render them invalid, because they are based on biblical principles.
What does family finance entail?
- It entails sustaining the family financially; this is based on trust.
- Financial integrity should be upheld.
What are the sources of family income?
- Salary
- Business earnings
- Dividends on shares and stocks
- Reliable investment
- Gifts
- Royalties
- Sales of properties, etc.
Money management in the home
Joint Account: A Joint account is a kind of concept that suggests the determination of married couples to put their resources together in a single account for the general upkeep of the home.
Joint purse/common purse: This is a concept whereby married couples keep their resources together in a joint account, and they both have a common purse/place where they keep money for daily family upkeep.
Project financing: This has to do with possessions, which include education, acquiring properties, building houses, travelling, etc.
Unfortunately, some couples have misunderstood this concept, thereby plunging themselves into a marital crisis. While some couples think that having a common purse is more helpful.
Others believe that keeping separate accounts is better because each person would have a say in what should be spent, how and on what it should be spent. However, what matters most is the ability of the couple to understand each other and apply the best method without cheating each other.
Should Christian Couples Be Encouraged to Operate a Joint Account
A marriage counsellor observed that the commonest problem couples face during their first year of marriage is the ability to manage their resources. Unfortunately, some intending and married couples talk virtually about many things that would be beneficial to them, but they seldom talk about money.
Money has the power to make or mar the marital relationship, especially when it is not properly handled. For example, intending couples should discuss whether they should operate a common purse (joint account), or maintain separate accounts and open a joint account for household expenses and major projects. Alternatively, they can have a shared responsibility in keeping the family and major projects.
However, from the Christian perspective, when “Two become One”, it includes everything, even their money. Therefore, the decision to maintain joint or separate accounts is an issue couples need to discuss before or during marriage. In the course of writing this piece, I had the opportunity to interview some Christian couples about their financial management. Their responses are as follows:
Different Opinions about Joint Accounts
Mr John Jack: Biblically speaking, what belongs to me belongs to my wife because we are no longer two but one. By the grace of God, keeping a joint account has worked for us the past 25 years without regret.
Mrs Oedema: We started with a joint account, but we were faced with a serious financial crisis because of my husband’s extravagant lifestyle. At a point, I became a perpetual borrower to meet the needs of the family, until we agreed to keep separate accounts with a shared responsibility for the family upkeep. Today, I can say with pride that I am debt-free and happy.
Reve and Mrs Osayamen: We operate a joint account, and it has worked for us for the past 15 years. However, while this may work well for some couples, it may be difficult for others. Ultimately, a joint account is most appropriate for Christian couples because it promotes a sense of togetherness and unity, which is vital for a successful marriage.
Benefits of Keeping a Family Joint Account
- It is a sign of obedience.
- It creates and promotes the spirit of oneness.
- It can serve as a model to other families.
- It encourages faithfulness and accountability.
- It makes us reflect on God’s mathematical principle, which states, one plus one is equal to one.
How to Overcome Financial Crisis
Quite a number of divorce cases in the world today are associated with money matters. Therefore, to overcome the financial crisis, the following should be considered.
Family Budget
The financial budget specifies a total sum of money needed for a specific purpose and time. It may include tithing, feeding, savings, housing, clothing, education, transportation, medical and miscellaneous. It will help you to control your spending and avoid unnecessary disagreements over the use of money.
Apply Biblical Perspective
Christian couples should understand that we are stewards. Therefore, we should tithe regularly and proportionally (Malachi 3:10) to avoid a financial crisis.
Faithfulness
Communication has always been a strong weapon to deal with family crises. Therefore, couples should learn to talk about their strengths and weaknesses in financial matters. Discuss where your habits meet or diverge, and then acknowledge what works best for you.
Having worked out a particular style that would be suitable for them, each of them should strive to be faithful. This would go a long way in helping them set the right course in their financial disagreement.
Prudence
Christian couples should learn to be prudent, especially ladies who want to be current in the fashion world. If this habit is not checked, it can be a threat to the relationship.
Plan Well
We should avoid wastage and set our goals right because good financial planning and management can minimise financial trouble in the family.
Have a Chief Financial Officer
The partner who is the “saver” can serve as the Chief Financial Officer (CFO), who would be responsible for most money matters. Any couple that operates this system should make sure that the other partner is not left in the dark.
Know Your Family
Every family must understand their uniqueness and adopt the system that best suits it.
Education
The Pastors and counsellors should properly educate “would-be couples”. They should be encouraged to discuss their financial matters, such as other issues, and agree on the system they wish to adopt.
Conclusion
The idea of operating a family joint account by couples has been abused in some families. It has resulted in enslavement, division, distrust, enmity, and divorce in some cases.
However, you should know that the decision to share the rest of your life with someone you love calls for compromise from both ends because marriage is all about flexibility and the ability to strike a balance. Also, we should know that the determination to attain a financial plan that works for each family might take some time and struggle before reaching a desired goal. You can read further on this page.
